The Beginner’s Guide to Video Sex

Video chat sex combines the hottest parts of a wicked online chat with showing yourself off online. It’s a way to be sexually connected when you’re apart. You get your partner’s undivided attention. And it’s fun! Here’s how to really relax and become an online video influencer…of your libidos!

Video Sex is for Everyone

If you’re shy, video chat sex has some surprising advantages. You get to try new things sexually while being in control. You’re in your location, with what you want to wear, and the toys you want to use. Feel free to focus the camera as—and where—you like it. You can pause your own action and simply watch your partner. People often say they feel more confident after video sex goes well. Maybe you will, too.

Do you enjoy role playing and taking selfies? You’ll love video chat sex. You’ve probably already got some favorite video messaging tech, but is it the best and most private option? Read on to see how you can raise your video game.

Be Safe and Secure with Negotiation and a Private App

Everyone wants to be safe online. The best way to be secure around sharing a sexy video is to trust the person you’re messaging. Talk to them about how you’ll connect and how you’ll treat your images and messages. See our article How To Keep Your Naughty Texts And Photos Private for tips.

Also, pick an app that will help your private messaging stay private. You may hear the phrase ‘Skype sex’ around video chat sex. But because of its corporate owners, Skype is as private as Facebook—that means not very private! Here are three apps with better user privacy. They are easy to use and free.

• Signal - You may already use Signal, one of the first high-security messaging apps. With Signal, you can also double-check that the person messaging you is who they say they are.
• Telegram – For discretion, this app includes a Secret Chat feature. You can even set your messages to auto-delete at a certain time, leaving no record on your devices.
• Threema – This app is so private, it deletes your messages from the Threema server after sending them. Plus, you can choose to protect your chats with a specific PIN code.

Learn more about the best apps to use for all your sexy messaging in The Best Apps for Secure Sexting.

Set Up for Your Video Date

Once you’ve agreed on how you’ll be safe and what app you’ll use, plan your first video date. It won’t take long to set up with this quick checklist.

• First, test your messaging app, camera, and sound. All apps offer a video and audio preview. How do you sound? Do you like how you look?
• It’s easy to improve how you look with lighting. Make your space appealing and flattering with low, consistent light. Try a few table lamps or candles, or light filtered through a sheer curtain.
• Using your phone to connect? Consider a phone tripod or micro-stand. One of these will keep your phone camera where you want it while you have your hands free.
• Have the toys and lubricant you want to use within reach. When it comes to toys for video chats, big and bright is great!
• Wear one of your favorite outfits. Taking it off slowly is a wonderful tease. Solid colors look best on video. Avoid polka dots, strong stripes, and lace. On video, these patterns can look like they’re vibrating – which isn’t the kind of vibration you’re looking for.
• Do you want music in the background? A playlist is a nice way to set the mood. It’s also helpful if you and your partner don’t want to talk all the time.

All ready? To get started, send a message to check that it’s still a good and private moment. You don’t want to start the call and find out their mom came over for a surprise visit! When you’re both ready, log in and let the games begin.

Include Turn Ons for Everybody

As with all sex, you can give and receive during a video date. Play together with things you both like.

The camera is your friend. Move it to show your whole self, or lean in to show off for a special close-up. Your face as you smile, talk, and enjoy yourself. Your chest, caressed and undressed by your slow hands. Even between your legs to get really wild!

Sound is a turn on, too—your voice most of all. Not sure what to talk dirty about? Try a favorite fantasy, or something you liked that you did together. If you’re pleasing yourself, your breathing and moans are especially inspiring.

Have Some Fresh Ideas to Get a Video Date Started:

• Send a sexy gift to your partner: clothes, a toy, special lubricant. Wait for your video date to “unbox” it and try it out.
• Role-play characters from a favorite movie or TV show. You’re both on screen, so make the most of it!
• Read an erotic story aloud, perhaps with the camera focused on your lips.
• Try light dominance and submission, with one partner making requests and another one fulfilling them.

End Your Video Date Gracefully

The perfect time to end a video date is when you’re both satisfied. If you haven’t come, and you’re okay with that, let them know. You may want to tease them about how turned on you’ll be until you meet up. Or tell them that you’re happy and had a good time.

Don’t just say, “That was great, see you!” and sign off. Spend a few minutes chatting, as if you were in the same bed, sharing your connection. And send a follow-up message the next day—particularly if your partner went the extra mile to turn you on.

You won’t always set up formally for a video session. After your first few video dates with someone, even a friendly chat or a catch-up can get spontaneously steamy.

Enjoy being a very private video star!

Have you checked out PleazeMe.com? It is a social media platform where adults can be adults. We created the 7 Worlds of PleazeMe so that every person would have a place to privately explore their sexuality with like-minded people.

We believe in love, sexuality, and the power of inclusion. People of all shapes and sizes, colors and ethnicities, genders and sexualities are valuable and deserve to feel included. Everyone should have a safe place they can go to connect, discover and express themselves without fear of being judged, censored or discriminated against.

Take Me There!