By Domina Doll

As we come upon a New Year it is time to re-evaluate where you’ve been last year and where you want to go this year.

Often, when we think of New Years, we think of new resolutions to make for the coming year. Our resolutions tend to be things we want to improve, like dieting, weight loss, a new job or career, a new crazy workout routine that we know we won’t do … you know… boring stuff.

Notice how all those things sound like “work”?

This year, why not try something different? Instead of choosing resolutions you don’t want to do, or that feel like work, why not start a sexy self-care ritual for you (and your lover too!)?

What is Sexy Self-care?

Sexy self-care is anything that makes you feel sexy, sensual, that is nurturing, body-positive, loving, playful, fun, and even erotic.

Here are some sexy self-care ideas to get you started!

1. Plan a Date Night

Plan a date night with you and your partner, or you by yourself. The idea here is to spend quality time alone or with your lover doing something you enjoy or even something new. There are hundreds of things you could do for date nights, and that’s a whole other list so let’s not go down that rabbit hole… But even things like staying at home and watching a movie (Netflix and chill!), making a gourmet meal to delight your taste buds, or going for a long walk in nature. Make a list and plan to do one fun thing together or solo every week, just because it makes you feel good.

2. Goddess Bathing Ritual

A Goddess Bathing Ritual is basically a luxurious bath, where you set an intention. Your intention can be anything you like, such as practising self-love where you lovingly wash every part of your body and tell your body how grateful you are for all your beautiful parts! Your intention could be just to de-stress, nurture and revitalize yourself. It could be a beauty ritual where you put on a face mask and a hot oil treatment for your hair. Or, a magical ritual where you invoke a Goddess (like Venus for Love) and meditate while soaking in a hot, soothing bath. Add things like essential oils, Himalayan bath salts, rose petals, soothing music and a magic water infused elixir. Then lay back and let the healing properties of water soothe your body, mind and soul. Water has the amazing quality to heal, and can carry your intention right into your cellular body!

3. Create a Scrumptious Treat of Aphrodisiacs

I love doing this on New Years night, just me and my partner, where we gather a bunch of erotic aphrodisiac treats to nibble upon as we sit and drink a glass of wine and call in the new year together. Anything you love that you don’t often eat can be added to your tray of treats, but make sure to make it an indulgence. Try oysters, fresh fruit, Belgium chocolate, crackers and cheese, olives, spanakopitas, brie cheese in a round French bread loaf baked in the oven with melted butter and slivers of almonds (YUM!), bruschetta, asparagus, artichokes, figs, spicy peppers, truffles and don’t forget the red wine! Make this even sexier by taking turns blindfolding each other and hand feeding your lover these erotic treats! Turn up the heat even more by getting naked and eating the aphrodisiacs off your lover’s body. Whipped cream, strawberries and melted chocolate all taste divine next to your lover’s hot, salty flesh. Just don’t get anything sugary near the vulva or vagina.

4. Self Pleasure

Sexy self-pleasure can be done anytime, but is especially awesome when you pair it with all of the above! First, plan a date night with yourself. Second, take a Goddess bath. Third, treat yourself to some nourishing yummy foods. And, finally, get out your favorite sex toy, vibrator or lube and pleasure yourself!

Ideas to amp up your self-pleasure ritual:

• Don’t just go for a quicky. Take at least an hour to explore all your erogenous zones and find new spots that give you pleasure.
• Don’t go straight for the vibrator! Use the vibrator to finish yourself off if you must, but first, explore your gorgeous body, all your sensuous curves and crevasses with your hands and fingers and a luscious massage oil.
• Try OM (Orgasmic Meditation) where you rub your clit using lube on the upper left-hand side of the clitoris (your sweet spot). Rub there gently and rhythmically, allowing the orgasmic pleasure to build until orgasm. This may take a while, especially if you are used to using a vibrator, but believe me, it is worth it.
• Give yourself a breast massage first. A breast massage is very erotic, nurturing and self-loving. Nipple stimulation releases oxytocin-the cuddle, feel good hormone. The nipple stimulation also corresponds to the same pleasure center in the brain that lights up when the clitoris and g spot are pleasured. And, it is self-loving, because your breasts are in the area of your heart chakra, so showing your breasts some love can open your heart to receive more love and pleasure. Plus, you may just experience a nipplegasm as a bonus!
• Try edging. Edging is a sexual technique where you bring yourself up to 8 or 9 on the pleasure scale (10 being orgasm), and then slow down your stimulation until you bring yourself down to a 5, then back up again to the brink of orgasm again and again (basically until you can’t stand it anymore!). Why do this you may ask? Because it will make your orgasm way bigger, longer and extend it into a full-body orgasm!
• Use your breath to circulate orgasmic energy throughout your body. You can also rock your hips and moan to heighten sexy energy and orgasm.

Finally, take your time, explore, and have fun!

5. Erotic Massage Erotic massage is something you can do solo or with a partner. All it takes is some loving intention and attention, your hands, some yummy massage oil like coconut oil and a willing body. You can perform an all over full-body massage, or just an erotic genital (yoni or lingam) massage.

A super sexy type of massage you can try is Nuru massage with your partner. This is when you both get naked, pour a slippery oil or lube all over your bodies, then slide over each other, using your sensual body parts to massage each other’s hot spots. You can buy Nuru kits online, or simply use coconut oil mixed with warm water and a bit of olive oil. Slick, nourishing, good for the skin and edible!

6. Take an Erotic Course The last Top Sexy Self-Care Tip for You and Your Lover is to invest in your relationship by taking a course in sexual play so you can become a better lover! This is a win-win-WIN! activity because you both reap the benefits.

You can take courses together, like Tantra for Lovers, or take some sexy self-care courses like this Foreplay Bundle from LoveUniv.com.

The Foreplay Bundle, includes the following courses:

Erotic Massage Course

Foreplay Course

Self Pleasure Course

Erotic Talk Course

In this bundle, you’ll master the art of erotic massage with step-by-step techniques that lead to intense orgasms for him or her; you’ll discover how erotic talk can get you into a juicy frame of mind and body, enhancing intimate communication. The Foreplay bundle also explores how self-pleasure is a key component of self-love and sexual health, and how mutual masturbation can teach couples to tap into each other’s deepest fantasies and desires.

The Foreplay bundle is an exploration of sensual breathing techniques, erotic vocal signals, kissing, undressing, sensual touch, as well as other unique foreplay techniques that can open a whole new world of sexual pleasure for yourself and your lover!

Wrapping it Up!

So, that’s your Top 6 Sexy Self-Care Tips for You and Your Lover for the New Year to help you make some fun, self-loving, nurturing and playful resolutions this season that you are going to love instead of loathe!

Make a promise to yourself right now, and say this mantra outload! “This year I promise to love my body and give myself the gift of sexy self-care rituals all year long!”

See… That wasn’t so hard was it?!Reschedule

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